I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
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