how can u be prego again
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
That was before I lit my hair on fire
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
