Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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