hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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