if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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