would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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