Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
she looked like the before picture.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
