Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
