they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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