So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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