You're completely useless in the revolution.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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