She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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