the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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