i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize