it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
