He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
