I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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