it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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