He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize
