Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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