great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
And then my night got REAL pukey
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
