why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
