fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
how drunk are you?
Several
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