There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
