Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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