I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
