He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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