Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize