i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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