ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
