Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
