After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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