You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
