It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
