Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
