i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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