IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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