are you still at the devil's house?
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I FOUND THE LEGS
I am available for nakedness
Randomize
