I got chris browned last night
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize