I can tuck mytits in my pants
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
