If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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