ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize