She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
