someone owes me an orgasm
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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