I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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