hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Be still, my beating vagina.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
