If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
