I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
