yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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