Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize