There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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