I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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